My Award

(My award and the few books that I managed to stuff into my suitcases for China. Random collection: Paris (travel book), The Nine (Supreme Court History), Palestine Peace not Apartheid (History...I want to see for myself if Carter is as crazy as some of my friends think), One Hundred Years of Solitude.)

So the other night, I went to the Beijing Zhongguancun Chapter of Toastmasters with Emlyn, a Welsh colleague of mine. I remember Chase Johnson saying Toastmasters' was a good time back in NYC, so I really wanted to check it out. When Emlyn mentioned he was a member, I asked him if I could tag along. The agenda for the meeting was extremely detailed; its the first time I've seen time allotments be planned out by the minute.

8:55pm Evaluator's report
8:57pm Hand back to Toastmaster
8:59pm Timer's report


I guess it's bc they evaluate you on your grasp of speaking time (if you go over, under, etc.) After guest introductions, we started something called Table Topics. This is where you volunteer to go up in front of the 40 or so people, pick a number, and then speak on whatever topic that number corresponds to. Since this was my first time ever at a Toastmaster's meeting, I wanted to lay low. People seemed to be pretty eager to volunteer, so I settled into my chair, ready to kick back and observe. However, given my luck, the guy who was running the table topics took a couple volunteers and then turned to me and pointed and said, "you." I really didn't have a choice. THAT'S not the worst part. I get up there, pick #1...and here's the topic I get.

"What if humans married rabbits?"

Me: ...Rabbits? Rabbits? Like the animals? Humans? Rabbits?

The other people got: Describe your first date. If you could stop time, what would you do? Who do you admire most?

I got...what if humans started getting it on with rabbits?


So, doing what I do best in moments like that, I just started talking...I can't really remember what I said...something about higher furniture, tighter laws so you don't squash someone's loved one, fuzzy babies...but I was mainly on autopilot because I had an inner dialogue going on. I was wondering...is this supposed to be one of those where the rabbits' mating tendencies/frequency is supposed to come into play? But wait...that would be so embarrassing and against the rules to mention...but thats kind of what I think about rabbits if I do think about rabbits, which I haven't...at least not in a while...ya know...mate like rabbits...

Anyways, I guess while I was discussing that with myself internally, I managed to do a good enough job. I ended up winning the table topics award of the night and got this nice Toastmaster's ribbon that's now hanging on the side of my TV. I think that's a great way to treat a guest. Applaud his or her every move, and then give them an award to take home at the end of the night. :)

Emlyn talked about the last 5 times he died. (PS: I think you were robbed, yours was so much better than the others!)

Emlyn had to run off to buy roses for his gf who is flying in from Siberia today [lucky lady! The roses, not Siberia], so I hung around and met more people. Everyone was really nice; they keep complimenting my Mandarin speaking skills. Speaking Mandarin is second nature to me, so its like if I walked up to you and said...wow, you're really good at breathing. How long have you been doing it? You do it better than I do!

But...I'm not complaining. Its always nice to hear people say you're awesome. Anyways, I gotta go, my ego is getting too big for this room.

PS: I feed hubcat kitty and her friend...this dark brown/black striped bear of a cat...every day at lunch time. My goal is for them to come running up to me when they see me walking towards the guest house everytime. That way, if I'm with someone, I can pretend to be surprised that the cats love me so much and say...well, you know...I guess I'm just in tune with nature. Animals and small children flock to me.

They sell these like plastic covered sausages in the snack shop behind my building; but I dont think people eat them anymore. They're like 1 cent each. I want to buy some so I'll have them on hand for hubcat, but I haven't yet because I keep thinking someone is going to look through my purse and think I carry around an emergency stash of cheap sausages. Seriously, I honestly worry about that. Its tough being so shallow but I manage.

PPS: I'm done at 10am tomorrow morning, and I'm going to meander down to pay my respeks (as Ali G would say it) to the Great Helmsman at the "Maosoleum." Translation: I'm going to go see Chairman Mao Ze Dong at his mausoleum.

PPPS: Enjoy these pictures.

A sea of heads walking into TianAnMen Gate. (The Gate of Heavenly Peace)

NCPA (National Center for Performing Arts...or as locals so lovingly call it...the Egg. Kinda funny, cause you know the Olympic Bird's Nest...the Egg....where are the Droppings?)

Its a completely different world over here. They put men on the cover of Cosmo, too.